3-2-1:  Discuss the “Undiscussable” with One Proactive Question

3-2-1 Get Balanced Wednesday

by Dr. Donnie

“Helping you align your daily behaviors with your priorities in life.”


3-2-1: Discuss the “Undiscussable” with One Proactive Question

Read on DONNIEHUTCHINSON.COM |  September 20, 2023



3 Ideas from me, 2 Quotes from others, and 1 Question to help you reflect on your work-life balance and wellbeing habits this week.

3 Ideas from Me


Most of us have recognized the downward spiral trends of people we work with or other close relationships. These spirals come in many varieties, such as overeating, alcohol abuse, depression, isolation, or other self-care neglectful behaviors.

The reality for many is that they struggle with these unhealthy behaviors in isolation. However, they are not the only ones affected by their behaviors. Frequently, their families, friends, and brothers and sisters they work with also suffer the consequences of their neglectful behaviors.


They generally do not talk about their struggles because they don’t know where to begin or who to talk to. Acknowledging our mental health struggles is a heavy lift, and reaching out to discuss it is usually more challenging. But does it have to be this way?

Most of us can see the signs of neglectful self-care behaviors yet are hesitant to ask the difficult questions. Let’s face it. It’s awkward, uncomfortable, and somewhat scary because we don’t want to embarrass the person or ourselves or make the person angry and isolate more.


Perhaps it would be helpful if we had a proactive formula to follow. In other words, how could we get comfortable asking the difficult, awkward, and somewhat scary question? You could ask the person when all is going well:


“If I ever notice something being off with you, maybe you are becoming detached, less interested in your family, stop doing things you enjoy, drinking too much, or overall sad and depressed; how would you like me to approach you and ask about it?


The beauty of asking this question before it is ever needed is that it gives you permission and a road map for approaching the person if the need arises. It will make you comfortable because the person is telling you how to approach them and has given you permission. I encourage you to ask many of your active and retired brothers and sisters this question and take notes of their answers. If we all would start doing this, we could help reduce unhealthy behaviors by discussing the undiscussable with this one proactive question.


2 Quotes from Others



I like to encourage people to realize that any action is a good action if it’s proactive and there is positive intent behind it.


— Michael J. Fox, Actor.



Don’t withhold good from someone who deserves it, when it is in your power to do so..”


–      Proverbs 3:27


 1 Question for You


How would you like for me to approach you if I ever noticed something “off” or “out of character” with you? Email me your answer at [email protected]. See how easy that was 😊   Please, please, and please go ask your brothers and sisters at work…and record their answers for future use.


Dr. Donnie’s AnswerI prefer a straight, direct shot. Just ask what’s on your mind. Don’t beat around the bush. Lay it out and hit me with the question between the eyes, knowing you are doing it with love.


I would love to hear your answer and if you find this newsletter helpful and encouraging. Email: [email protected]


Please share this newsletter with your friends and co-workers via email by copying the link:




Until next week, may God bless you, your family and may the Glory be to God.


– Dr. Donnie Hutchinson


The format and style of this newsletter were inspired and highly influenced by James Clear 3-2-1 Newsletter. The content is strictly Dr. Donnie’s.